Consequences in Practice

The following painful cases for children have been observed and are described below:

• Placement of the child in the custody of the father against the child's wishes
• Placement of the child in the custody of the mother against the child's wishes
• Placement of the child in alternating/shared custody against the child's wishes
• Separation of siblings against their will (one with the mother, the other with the father), so that each parent gets "at least something"
• Special study – Trivialization the child's illness
• Special study – Removal of children from a single mother to foster care/children's home
• Special study – Children in a complete family against their will
• Special study – Placement of the child in the custody of the father against the child's wishes – after a decision by the ECtHR; Request for assessment by GREVIO and for a renewed statement from ECtHR. Request for statement from the UN (Ms. Reem Alsalem).  
• Special help – "I'm sending this message out into the world... Beáta"

Note for reflection: 1) All of the above examples have serious negative consequences for the psychological development of children. For each of the cases mentioned, let us first ask: Would it not be enough to eliminate these consequences (i.e., the suffering of children) if custody decisions were made solely based on the history of the parent-child relationship and the child's wishes—right at the first hearing, held within a month of separation? 

Note for reflection: 2) Now look at the real-life consequences (below). For each case, ask yourself: How did this child feel? How does the child feel now? Would his life have turned out better if the court had looked into the family's past, listened to the child (who they feel safe with), and respected his wishes? And in cases where the final consequence is not known from the media—do you hope the child has not yet lost hope for a better life? Is it your wish too, that every child lives in an atmosphere of love, happiness, and understanding?

The core ideas on which practice in the Czech Republic is based (Cochem practice, alternating custody, parental equality) have been applied in practice for many years. So let's take a look at the consequences—because we now have years of experience to reflect on. 

Children placed in the exclusive custody of the father against the child's wishes

8/2025 – Childhood Trauma – I ran away from home, my father was violent.

Podcast: "Raise with Love"

Podcast "Raise with Love" focuses on conversations with people who carry childhood trauma and are not afraid to talk about it.

Quote (Child - C, Reporter - R):

C: I was born into a family where one parent was a manipulator, a tyrant, both physically and mentally abusive. I had one brother and a completely normal mom. The first moment was when I saw him rape my mom — I had just come back from shopping with my younger brother.

R: Did he primarily hurt your mom, or you as well?

C: Physically, sometimes my brother and me too — sometimes a smack on the butt, but I think those are kind of normal things. But he hurt my mom in a way that she had bruises.

R: What was your typical day like? Was your dad around in some way? Was he not? Did he go on trips with you? Or was it mainly your mom who took care of you?

C: Mom. Mom was with us all the time. When we were little, she didn't work — dad forbade her until I was ten. That's why I loved her so much and formed a bond with her. And that's probably why I'm a bit more sensitive, like her. Dad was at work, usually came home in the evening. Every time I saw him, I was scared of him, even as a little kid. Because of how he behaved, I was afraid, so I was glad he wasn't home.

R: Did it ever make you sad that you didn't have a good relationship with your dad?

C: No. Over time I got used to the fact that he's just like that. And mom always supported me, so I always went to her. Dad didn't care that I played hockey. He favored my brother, who studied. He made big differences between us, like I was completely stupid.

R: What hurt you the most from your dad?

C: Because of him, I have no self-confidence. Humiliation after every training session — since I was little, I kept hearing that I was the worst. When you hear that from a parent, from someone who's supposed to give you healthy self-esteem… So the lack of self-confidence, that's probably the worst thing he did to me when I was a kid. But what came later — that hurt me the most.

R: What's your relationship with your brother like now?

C: We saw each other twice this year. None. We don't talk at all. Ever since I left home, we haven't seen each other, because he's still in dad's bubble — that I'm the worst, that I went to mom, who was always considered the worst in our family after she left. Maybe it'll change in adulthood, once my brother lives on his own, once he's no longer under dad's roof — but that takes time.

R: When did your mom leave?

C: It was when I was about 11 or 12 years old, and it happened because I told her to get a divorce. I couldn't stand how dad kept yelling at her — there was constant shouting at home, and mom was the one who suffered. She wanted to leave, but she was scared. But when I told her too, she probably started thinking about it more seriously. Mom moved out and filed for divorce. And as soon as the divorce papers came, dad started manipulating us into saying what he told us to say — to the social workers, exactly what he dictated. So we were supposed to say we wanted to see mom once every two weeks on Mondays — when she was at work. Dad knew that, somehow found out, just so she wouldn't see us at all, to completely cut us off from her. We had to say that to the social workers. My brother spoke for me the whole hour and a half we were there — I didn't say a word, because I knew I didn't want to say it, and I wouldn't say what dad wanted. He told us mom was doing drugs, that she was somewhere high, that she had nowhere to live — he kept feeding us that after she left. My brother believed it — he was two years younger, only 10 at the time, he had no chance to see the reality. So he said there that he wanted to see her once every two weeks on Mondays. And then suddenly dad won the court case and got custody of us. And then came the turning point.

R: And when the decision came, did social services check on you afterward?

C: No, not even once. They didn't come. They didn't check. No.

R: How did you feel about having to stay with your dad? What emotions did you have?

C: I saw that it was two against one. They spoke negatively about mom, but worse was that he forbade us from communicating with her. If we talked to her, there would be trouble. That it would end badly. Dad didn't come to any of my games, mom wasn't there either. I basically lived alone, and I was twelve.

R: Did your mom try to contact you?

C: She tried — even wrote a letter. Dad tore it up in front of us, saying it was all nonsense. That we didn't need to see it, that it would be some kind of manipulation from her. That hit me hard too. And even back then, a deep hatred toward my dad started growing inside me — I was maybe 14 or 15. I already had thoughts of leaving or something… I just couldn't take it anymore. The mental illnesses that my dad caused — through how he behaved and who he was — started to develop. I had to stay with him until I was 18.

R: So during those six years, nothing changed at all?

C: No, nothing changed.

R: That's quite a long time to develop psychological problems.

C: Dad never liked me since I was little — he preferred my brother.

R: Did the violence escalate after you were alone there without your mom?

C: Yes. I was similar in nature to my mom — or I still am — and dad saw that in me. So the psychological abuse he used on her — yelling, seeking conflict — he transferred onto me. What mom used to go through, I started going through. So in the end, it was even worse for me than when mom was still there. I just wanted peace, and it got even worse. The pressure was directly on me, not on mom anymore — I took all of it, all his stress from work. He'd come home in the evening, and if I hadn't pushed in the chair after dinner, there'd be a three-hour explosion. Three hours of him yelling at me, calling me an idiot — and that was every day. Then I developed suicidal thoughts, because I didn't want to be there anymore. I even wrote a goodbye letter. I told him about it — and he laughed at me. Later I started having psychological attacks, couldn't even get out of bed. I realized he would never take it seriously — he'd just laugh at me. He said there were no psychos in his house and that I was just making it up. So in front of all his friends, I was the liar — making things up. And that was horrible to hear. You're sitting there, feeling mentally broken, and no one believes you — because of dad. And he acted like a nice guy on the outside, like he was polite and decent, but no one saw what was behind closed doors. His friends always saw a different version of him than who he really was. They didn't even find it strange when he said I was making it all up — they saw no reason why I'd have panic attacks. They didn't believe it. Not even the people around me. No one believed me, and that was incredibly hard. I had depression.

R: Did you try to seek professional help?

C: I tried, but when my dad kept saying he didn't have any psycho in the house, he didn't even want to take me there. I begged him for two years — I was untreated, and it kept getting worse. Then one day he finally took me to a psychologist. The diagnosis was written down, and he told her to delete it from the records — that it wouldn't be there at all. He lashed out at her, said he'd get a lawyer, went on the offensive, saying that if it stayed in the system, it would show up in my driver's license, that I was mentally ill, and stuff like that. He forced her to delete it — maybe she didn't, because she said it wasn't possible — but he told me we were leaving and that we wouldn't go back there again. I was so close to seeing a psychiatrist, to getting medication, to maybe starting treatment — but he denied me that. He told me to pack up and that we were leaving. I started yelling at him in front of her and broke down crying — it was really awful. But in the end, I had to obey him.

R: You mentioned that later a situation escalated?

C: I reconnected with my mom when I was seventeen, about half a year before this situation happened. I gathered the courage and wrote to her. We met. She saw the state I was in and wanted to help — she hadn't seen me in five years. She booked me an appointment with a therapist, and that's where I started planning my escape, so there wouldn't be any issues with child protection services (OSPOD). But I couldn't hold out any longer — just before I turned eighteen. After school, a friend contacted me, asking if I was okay, and I said no. She knew a little bit about what was going on. So she took me and drove me to a place where I stayed for five days, and all I wished was that the police wouldn't find me.

After five days, she found out I was listed as missing. I told her I had made an agreement with my dad that I was going away for a few days. So she grabbed me and said she'd take me to my mom. I arrived at her workplace, and she immediately offered that I could stay with her. She saved me from my dad — I didn't have to go back to him and could stay with her. Even though it was before I turned eighteen, no one really dealt with it anymore, not even OSPOD — they didn't push it since it was just a month before my birthday.

What hurt me later was that people started saying I made it all up, that I did it for attention. Because no one knew what was happening at home. I didn't have the courage to tell anyone. No one knew why it happened, why I ran away. And that came even from people close to me.

R: What was your dad's reaction to your escape?

C: He reported that I hadn't come home, and then went with my brother to Austria for a ski trip — like he didn't care at all. When my mom reported to the police that I had been found, they called my dad, and he said he was in Austria and that it was fine, that I'd been found. And that when he got back, he'd come pick me up. Of course, he wanted me to return, because he never admitted to doing anything wrong — even now. He still laughs in my face, like we're buddies. No apology, nothing. I stayed with my mom. I didn't have any of my things — I only got them after six months. He didn't want to give them to me. A year later, I finally got my road bike.

Friend: I confronted his brother a lot when C. was missing. I thought someone had done something to him — we didn't know what was going on inside. When he was found, people around acted without empathy — there was just curiosity. I was really disappointed by the community, which basically rejected him. We became the black sheep of our town.

R: What was it like returning to your mom after all those years? Was it hard to rebuild the relationship?

C: It was. Mom didn't know me at all. She had gone through psychological abuse with him too, so she felt terribly guilty that I was going through the same thing — she blamed herself for leaving me there. But I never blamed her. I told her to leave, and I was happy and relieved that she was safe, that dad wouldn't beat her or mentally torture her anymore. It was hard — the relationship wasn't the same as before. But it's been a year now, and things are slowly getting better. We're starting to find our way back to each other, like we used to have.

R: When you were a teenager dealing with depression and panic attacks, did any adult notice that you were often absent from school, or that you were showing symptoms — anything that might have made someone realize what was going on?

C: I went to school even with those mental states — dad wouldn't let me stay home. I was out of it, drowsy, but no one addressed it. Did a teacher ask? Yeah, someone did, but they just thought I was lazy. No one could have guessed — I didn't say anything. And even when they asked, I didn't want to talk about what was happening at home, because I was scared. I was afraid dad would find out, etc.

Now I've been seeing a therapist for a year, and I also go to a psychiatrist. I've started treatment — I was finally allowed to. About hockey: I'm injured, I can't play. But even when I left, I couldn't play — I didn't have my gear. The equipment costs 50,000 CZK. I was completely cut off. I want to become a physiotherapist — to help people.

R: What's your relationship like with your parents now? And do you want your dad to be part of your life?

C: With mom, we're improving our relationship — everything's fine with her, I feel really good with her. As for dad — I don't want any contact, only for official matters. Otherwise, I don't want him in my life, because that person ruined my entire childhood and adolescence. He stole a significant part of my life — my direction — I couldn't grow up peacefully.

And with my brother — we don't see each other. I hope that will change once he grows up, once he leaves dad's house. That things will start to improve and we'll reconnect.

R: How much did you miss having a proper male role model?

C: Of course I missed it. I dealt with it by realizing that what I saw in my dad was wrong — a bad example — and I know how to behave properly. I took it as an example of how life shouldn't be.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qzHPmU83Qg

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (domestic violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); No examination of the history of the family relationship; institutional cooperation (child protection services, court) aimed at ensuring the child maintains a relationship with both parents, or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's parenting — even though one parent did obstruct, precisely due to the presence of violence. The minor's contact with the mother — whom he perceived as an emotional anchor — was significantly restricted. The child was afraid to speak, which is understandable. He did not believe he had any chance of improving his life situation.

Note for reflection: 1): In this case, you are able to identify not only the exact cause (which, in all publicly revealed cases, is the same), but also the precise consequence. The story is therefore complete, and to prevent similar cases from happening again, it is possible to work systemically on eliminating the cause.

Note for reflection for psychologists: 1): Please comment following statement (based on testimonies from parents or children who have experience with both sensitivity and aggression of children): If children are sensitive, taking after the sensitive parent, they tend to develop low self-worth and depression, leaning toward suicidal thoughts. If a child instead adopts the behavior of the violent parent as a behavioral standard, it negatively affects his future relations and family relationships due to violence.

March 2025 – A father from Roudnice abused his son, who died by suicide by jumping in front of a train, as ruled by the Litoměřice court.

"A long-running case, in which dozens of witness testimonies were heard, was resolved today, Monday, March 3, by the Litoměřice District Court. Fifty-one-year-old J. H. from Roudnice nad Labem was found guilty of excessively punishing his son over a period of five years, leading to the boy's suicide at the age of nearly 15 in 2021."

"The boy was raised almost exclusively by his father during a critical period and never confided in his mother about the beatings. However, she testified that she had noticed a broken nose and a bloodshot eye, and when she asked him what had happened, he responded irritably. After separating from the mother in 2016, the father was granted full custody following a court ruling. The mother added that the man had beaten and humiliated her before the breakup, especially when he had been drinking. After losing the custody case, she saw her son only once every two weeks and only briefly. During these visits, he never told her that his father mocked or beat him. He dismissed visible minor injuries with explanations unrelated to abuse."

The public prosecutor described: "In the shared household, he excessively punished his son by punching him — especially in the stomach and shoulder — slapping him, mocking and humiliating him." He also broke the boy's nose and strangled him. A young witness stated: "He was afraid to go home. He told us he didn't look forward to it, that it wasn't easy, that his father once fired a gun near his head." Other witnesses said: "The father shouted vulgar insults at the boy during hockey practice when he was five," "When he got a bad grade, he beat him until he bled," "He once said he was thinking about ending his life because of his father." The father's ex-partner testified: "He slammed him against the wall, strangled him, punched him in the nose, and told him he would shoot him." "When she once tried to defend the boy, he pushed her away and said she'd get hit too."

The defendant's guilt was proven beyond any doubt, although he denied abusing the child throughout the proceedings — as is commonly seen in practice. "Key evidence came from witness testimonies, with nearly 30 people speaking in detail, many of whom did not know each other."

The father was sentenced to three years in prison, suspended for a five-year probation period, with the justification that the loss of his son was already a great enough pain.

https://litomericky.denik.cz/zlociny-a-soudy/soud-tyrani-syn-sebevrazda-litomerice-20231121.html

https://litomericky.denik.cz/krimi/soud-tragedie-tyrani-sebevrazda-litomerice-20241129.html

https://litomericky.denik.cz/zpravy_region/roudnice-soud-tyrani-vlak-rozsudek.html

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (domestic violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); No examination of the history of the family relationship; institutional cooperation (child protection services, court) aimed at ensuring the child maintains a relationship with both parents — or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's parenting. In this case, the parent did obstruct, precisely due to the presence of violence. The minor's contact with the mother — whom he perceived as an emotional anchor — was significantly restricted. The child was afraid to speak, which is understandable. He did not believe he had any chance of improving his life situation.

Note for reflection for psychologists 1): Does a violent parent truly feel love for their child — and therefore pain from the child's death — even after years of cruel, heartless abuse and emotionally detached behavior? Or is the grief over the child's death rooted in something else — for example, the loss of the person they used to "take it out on"?

November 2024 – A nine-year-old boy wrote to the Constitutional Court saying he did not want to be with his father. He was unsuccessful.

"I don't want to be with my dad and only see my mom on weekends" — that's how the request of a nine-year-old boy could be summarized. He turned to the Constitutional Court, but was unsuccessful. The panel, led by reporting judge Daniela Zemanová, did not see a sincere wish of a small child behind the unusual request."

"According to the Constitutional Court, the minor complainant, due to his still young age, is not capable of fully understanding the meaning of judicial proceedings, expressing his own opinion in a qualified way, and especially evaluating the possible consequences."

"The boy is represented by a guardian ad litem. That guardian had previously stated disagreement with the mother's position and reminded the court that the mother had long refused to accept the father, had filed various motions and criminal complaints — none of which the courts found to be justified."

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family; institutional cooperation (child protection services, court) aimed at ensuring the child maintains a relationship with both parents — or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's parenting. In this case, the parent did obstruct, precisely due to the presence of violence. The minor's contact with the mother — whom he perceives as an emotional anchor — was significantly restricted. 

https://www.novinky.cz/clanek/domaci-devitilety-kluk-psal-ustavnimu-soudu-ze-nechce-byt-s-tatou-neuspel-40499492

The minor boy was placed in the custody of his father by a preliminary court order, and contact with his mother was adjusted to one weekend every two weeks. During the proceedings, the mother pointed to violence committed by the father against the child, specifically stating: "The appellate court ignored the documented health condition of the minor and the father's neglect of medical care. In this context, the mother particularly highlighted injuries sustained during parkour (the father repeatedly removed the ankle brace from the child's foot) and persistent ear pain. According to the complainant, the father is committing acts of violence against the minor, as evidenced by bruises and scratches on his body."The minor expressed that he has a positive relationship with his mother.

The mother submitted medical reports. The father countered with other medical documentation. Supporting the father were reports from the police and a psychologist, who stated that the child was faking the injuries. The mother did not cooperate with the court-appointed psychologist. According to the psychologist's reports, the mother instructed the child on how to behave during the sessions. Based on this, the psychologist concluded that the mother is most likely manipulating the child against the other parent, does not support care for his health, and is using the child to achieve her own goals. The courts considered psychotherapeutic treatment for the minor to be urgent.

The Municipal Court also took into account that the mother continued to record the child, despite having previously been informed of the inappropriateness and harmfulness of such behavior for the minor. The father established cooperation with the psychologist, which led to slight progress in the child's treatment.

However, the Municipal Court found that the minor is seriously endangered in his development by the complainant, as the mother does not respect court decisions, recommendations, or instructions received during the custody proceedings. The Constitutional Court stated that the appellate court cannot be faulted for completely disregarding the complainant's rights. It also noted that expanding custody (specifically referring to shared custody) places increased demands on both parents regarding their mutual communication and understanding of the other parent's differing views.

https://www.zakonyprolidi.cz/judikat/uscr/ii-us-1827-24-1

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); no examination of family relationship; institutional cooperation (child protection services, psychologist, court) aimed at ensuring the child maintains a relationship with both parents — or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's parenting. In this case, the parent did obstruct, precisely due to the presence of violence. The minor's contact with the mother — whom he perceives as a stable emotional anchor — was significantly restricted.

Questions to ask: Even in this case, the mother claimed that violence was being committed against the child, and the child expressed a sincere wish to live with the mother. Isn't it entirely logical that a loving parent would try to save their child — and if the child speaks about violence, that the loving parent would want to record such testimony in order to provide evidence later? Is this not a case of secondary victimization of the child by the court? Why is it not considered that the father — having full custody — may significantly influence the child through intimidation, especially in contexts such as police interviews, school, etc.? This is supported by further consequences observed in practice. The child is afraid. Why does the psychologist focus on alleged manipulation by the mother, without examining the child's relationship with the father or the child's past — how the child experienced their childhood so far? In the best interest of the child is to grow up in happiness, love, and understanding — which the child feels with the mother, as is evident from the court resolution. Once again, there is mention of a kind of forced requirement to understand the differing opinion of the other parent. But if the child does not feel safe with that parent, and there are signs of violence — is the loving parent supposed to understand this sadness and suffering and still support the relationship?Don't you think the child has the right to express themselves, that their opinion should be respected, and that they have the right to a childhood filled with happiness, love, and understanding?

June 2023 – Novinky.cz: Ten-year-old boy refused to see his father. The court ruled: send him to an institutional care.

Continuation of the case:Novinky.cz: In an institution, the child will not find a path to his father, the court believes

The mother appealed the decision, and on May 31, the Regional Court in Brno overturned the preliminary measure. According to the ruling, which Právo has obtained, it is absolutely clear that there is a long-standing conflict between the parents, which their son is suffering from. However, the expert opinion does not indicate that the mother is turning the son against the father, and the boy's attitude may be shaped by memories of possible incidents with the father. "None of the psychologists who have worked with the family long-term expressed a clearly positive view of placing the minor in a neutral environment. On the contrary, they consider this approach risky, as the minor perceives the mother as a stable emotional anchor. Furthermore, the prognosis for the development of the relationship between the minor and the father after returning from the neutral environment back to the household is highly uncertain, and if the parents' attitudes remain unchanged, the original situation may immediately return," the appellate court warned.

Due to administrative procedures and questionable actions by the crisis center, the boy was released — or rather taken away with police assistance — only on June 7. According to Lidmila Adlerová, vice-president of the court for the guardianship division, everything was in accordance with the law. She pointed out that the municipal court could only act once the case file was returned from the appellate court. 

Unfortunately, judicial practice is such that the decision of the appellate court first goes back to the lower court, which then forwards the ruling to the parties involved. The legal representative had to wait for the delivery of the decision and then requested the crisis center to immediately hand the minor over to the mother's care. However, the crisis center demanded an official clause. Therefore, the legal representative had to contact the police, asking them to intervene against the restriction of the minor's personal freedom and obstruction of an official decision. Only then did the crisis center act.

Identified Practice:  Forget diagnoses (violence does not exists, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family relationship; the cooperation between the court and the child protection authority (OSPOD) aimed to ensure the child's relationship with both parents — or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed, specifically due to violence). The minor is stressed by the parental conflict and was therefore placed in a "neutral environment" — namely, an institution where contact with the mother was prohibited, even though the child perceives the mother as a stable anchor.

Given the extensive analysis of current case law, this case is unique in that the appellate court assessed the actual situation as different from that described by  the first instance and truly ruled in favor of the child's best interest, allowing him to experience a happy and fulfilling childhood in a safe environment. Unfortunately, even this boy had to suffer — during the time spent in the institution — again as a result of poor decisions made by OSPOD and the court.

https://www.novinky.cz/clanek/domaci-v-ustavu-dite-cestu-k-otci-nenajde-mini-soud-40434772

1/2022 SOOD Bulletin – "When the State Abuses Children and Drives Them Almost to Suicide"

Fifteen-year-old Honzík: "Mom is kind, dad beats me. Since I was five, it's been heavy hitting. 'You can't do anything, you're useless.'" "Mom used to save me. Dad beat her too, called her a bitch, a whore, said she was stupid."

He is supposed to attend therapy with his father. "Dad told me it would rearrange things in my head and I'd start going to him — that I'd, pardon me, shit myself from it." Psychiatric Clinic of General University Hospital and First Faculty of Medicine, Charles University: It is not possible to enforce contact with the father through violence; in such a situation, there is a high risk of suicidal behavior. Report by MUDr. Jan Lorenc:Anxious-depressive disorder with post-traumatic stress syndrome. Expert opinion by PhDr. Simona Měchová: The minor refuses contact with the father. If this is not respected, there is a risk of serious disruption to the child's development and damage to his psyche in the form of psychological trauma. The minor has suicidal and self-harming thoughts in connection with possible contact with the father. For these reasons, the expert does not recommend even supervised contact.

And what did the Prague-West court decide? It ordered supervised contact with the father. And how did social workers OSPOD respond? The Černošice Municipal Office recommended disregarding the minor's opinion, stating: "It is not acceptable for a child to dictate to adults where he will or will not go, considering that the entire situation must be resolved in the best interest of the child. For the child's overall development, contact with both parents is necessary." SOOD stated: "International research shows that only five percent of reported cases of sexual abuse are false, usually involving older children. But here, the approach is as if that ratio were reversed."

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exists, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family relationship; the cooperation between the court and OSPOD aims to ensure the child's relationship with both parents (equality), or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed — specifically due to violence)

https://www.sood.cz/wp-content/uploads/2022/06/Zpravodaj-SOOD-2022-1.pdf  

 2/2016 SOOD Bulletin – "The Mother Reported Abuse and Lost Her Children"

The mother reported violence against the children and left the father. Two psychologists, a pediatrician, and two child psychiatrists considered the boy's statements credible and recommended that he not be exposed to traumatizing and stressful situations or contact with the father. Following police advice, the mother turned to court-appointed expert Mgr. Petra Sumcová from the University Hospital in Plzeň. Her conclusions were: "The minor shows signs of stress response with fluctuations during retraumatization — investigations or contact with the father. I arrive at a well-founded suspicion that the disorder is caused by sexual abuse by the father. Furthermore, the minor is being secondarily traumatized during repeated examinations, especially when confronted with the disbelief of those around him." Institutional psychologist: "He often cries, and in any discomfort says he wants to be with his mom. He shouts that he needs to do something but can't because he has no strength. He is very stressed, unhappy, and emotionally unstable. However, his emotions are appropriate and correspond to the current stress load of a child who has been isolated from his mother — from a nurturing environment — and has lost strong emotional bonds. Péťa cooperated very well, quickly broke into tears, and shared deep feelings of captivity, fear, and sorrow. He fears he doesn't know how to dose the truth so that it's not too much and doesn't cause harm. He's afraid he'll never see his mom again. He fears that no one believes him. His fragile psyche is being exposed to stress that could seriously endanger his further psychological development." Observations of Honzík: Regression in development, frequent self-harm, and cries for help expressing deep despair (thoughts of death). When the mother tried to speak with the children, the father hit her in the head in front of them. The children screamed, "Stop, mom is kind!" and cried behind the door for several minutes. Honzík is sad in kindergarten, Péťa is withdrawn and doesn't talk to anyone. The mother was fined 15,000 CZK for greeting the children during their placement in the institution. Nothing changed for the children, even after SOOD alerted the Ministry of Labour and Social Affairs, the Public Defender of Rights, the Regional Office of the Plzeň Region, MPs, and senators from the social affairs committee. The court responded by considering only two expert opinions from court-appointed experts who, as is common in Czech judicial practice, did not believe the children. The judge placed both children in the father's custody and granted the mother supervised contact — twice a week for one hour — at the child protection authority under the supervision of a social worker.

https://www.sood.cz/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/zpravodaj-SOOD-2016-2.pdf

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family relationship, the cooperation between the court, social workers and experts aims to ensure the child's relationship with both parents (equality), or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed — specifically due to violence)

 2/2016 SOOD Bulletin – "Boy Placed in Father's Custody in 2008"

During the custody proceedings, the mother reported domestic violence committed against both herself and the child to the court and OSPOD.

https://www.sood.cz/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/zpravodaj-SOOD-2016-2.pdf

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses; the violence does not exist, no examination of the history of family relationship, the cooperation between the court and social workers aims to ensure the child's relationship with both parents (equality), or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed — specifically due to violence)

Placement of The Child The Custody of The Mother Against The Child´s Wishes

2019 – She locked her sons in the basement and beat them with her fists. She is a better-quality parent, experts wrote

The case of two boys who were brutally beaten by their mother and her partner—using fists and even a knife—reveals a massive failure of the authorities. Although the children's father repeatedly reported suspicions of abuse to the court, police, and child protection services (OSPOD), no one intervened for years. According to court testimony, the children endured hell from the adults in their family starting at the ages of three and five. The indictment describes beatings with fists, knife wounds to the feet, forced housework, and nights spent in a basement where their "bed" was a sack filled with hay. Yet the authorities only acted four years after the first warning was sent to the Department of Social-Legal Protection of Children in Brandýs nad Labem, suggesting that two young boys might be severely abused in a house on the outskirts of Čelákovice in Central Bohemia.

"I still can't get over it," says František Š., the father of the abused boys, who reported the serious suspicions years ago. His account brings new and very serious findings to this shocking case, which was brought to light this Monday by Seznam Zprávy. And František Š. hasn't even mentioned that it took another three years after the abusers were exposed before at least one of them stood trial. Lenka K., who had been granted custody of the children, was only sentenced this Monday to six years in prison for systematic violence against her sons. Her partner, Ivan F., has not yet been punished because he disappeared to his native Ukraine.

The story told to the Seznam Zprávy reporter by the boys' father is disturbing. It began when the boys' mother—now convicted, though not yet with a final verdict—Lenka K., found a new partner, and the sons started refusing to return from weekends spent with their father. In 2017, František Š. also began noticing bruises on their bodies. It seemed suspicious to him, so he alerted the child protection services (OSPOD) in Brandýs nad Labem. "It never led to anything," he now says about the work of the local officials. He claims he did everything he could to convince the authorities in Brandýs, including providing video and photo documentation of all signs of abuse he noticed when the children arrived for the weekend. "We always took pictures when we picked them up. Whether they had new bruises or not. On Sundays, we filmed videos to have evidence. Because otherwise, we had nothing in hand," the father explains, showing the reporter more than ten video recordings. The footage contains heartbreaking scenes: especially the younger son, then three years old, is seen crying and resisting, saying he doesn't want to leave his father. "I don't want to go to mommy," he screams.

In two recordings, the older son, then five, explains why: "Ivan keeps yelling at us and hitting us." When asked if they can play at home, he replies no. "We have to do rubber bands. Tear them off. We have to do it." The father explained to the authorities what "doing rubber bands" meant when the children outright refused to return to their mother and OSPOD had to intervene. "They have to help with work their mother arranged to do at home—cleaning car seals," he said during a meeting with officials on March 4, 2019. Even that—two years after the father first reported his suspicions of abuse—did not change the authorities' stance that the children were fine with their mother. In the official record, the social agency stated that it was undesirable to "arbitrarily change the established routine of the children as determined by the court ruling."

What are experts even for? That same year, father František Š. asked the District Court of Prague-East to be granted custody of his sons. In his request for a preliminary injunction, he described his concerns about the children: "I believe the children are being bullied and beaten," reads the document obtained by Seznam Zprávy. As evidence, he submitted recorded videos. Nevertheless, the court denied his request, and he later applied for joint custody. That request was also rejected.

"There was no reason found to change the upbringing arrangement," wrote judge Martina Tomášová in her ruling, stating that it was in the children's best interest—especially considering their young age—to remain with their mother. "The environment at the mother's was found to be more suitable, and the mother also appears to be a more appropriate parental figure, particularly based on the conclusions of the expert opinion," the judge wrote.

In that "environment," as we now know, the children were subjected to horrific abuse. Yet the judge relied on expert assessments. The father—whom the children sought refuge with—was portrayed by the experts as having "traits of impulsiveness, emotional instability, and dissociality." The mother's parenting abilities were rated as "higher quality" by experts in psychology and psychiatry. However, three years later, different experts involved in the criminal proceedings reached completely different conclusions. As stated in the indictment read this Monday at the Prague Regional Court, Lenka K. is "hostile, angry, quarrelsome, behaves aggressively toward others, and has assaultive thinking."

Spokesperson for the District Court of Prague-East, Zuzana Steinerová, wrote to Seznam Zprávy regarding the case: "Allow me to express regret that the situation you describe occurred." She stated that the court made its decision based on a report from a psychologist working with the minor, a report from family therapy, a social investigation, and records from OSPOD meetings. "The children were also examined, and it was concluded that no negative influence from the mother's partner (which had originally been alleged) was found," the spokesperson said. She again emphasized that the court relied on expert opinions, which favored the mother.

The expert assessments of both parents were prepared in 2019 by psychologist Marek Preiss and psychiatrist Bronislav Kobeda. "It's very unpleasant," said Marek Preiss, now head psychologist at the National Institute of Mental Health, when commenting on the case. "The idea that abuse should have been uncovered and wasn't is very troubling for me as an expert," he stated when confronted with the case by Seznam Zprávy. He declined to comment directly on the report that served as the basis for the court's decision, saying it "might be unethical." He described the report as very detailed. 

According to Preiss, the information available during the assessment is crucial. "It really depends on what the parents disclose during the expert evaluation. It's one thing if, in this case, the father mentioned the abuse during the assessment, and another if he didn't. Another factor is that the second expert report was prepared as part of a criminal case, so those experts already had access to the case file," Preiss explained in defense of his conclusions.

The father of the abused children, František Š., tried to fight for his sons on all fronts. More than four years ago, he also filed a criminal complaint with the police. The case was handled by Central Bohemian police officer Jana Zemancová. However, in June 2019, she closed the case. "So far, no suspicion has been found that the matter involves a criminal offense, misdemeanor, or other administrative violation," Zemancová wrote in the police document obtained by Seznam Zprávy.

When asked how she reached that conclusion, she was unable to explain it to the Seznam Zprávy reporter. She said she only vaguely remembered the case. "I don't think I'll be able to tell you anything more specific, because I have a hunch, but I don't remember anymore," the officer said. In a follow-up request for comment, she later wrote in a text message that "she will not comment on the case in any way."

Despite this being a case of long-term abuse of defenseless children—who continued to suffer even after testimonies and visual evidence were presented—the response to the new findings by the editorial team has been lukewarm. As if it doesn't concern them. The case of former spouses František Š. and Lenka K. was handled over time by two employees at the Brandýs social services office. Neither of them works there anymore. And according to the statement from the supervising authority—the Central Bohemian Regional Office—their direct supervisor at the time is also no longer employed there. The current head of Brandýs OSPOD, Jan Vaněk, and the spokesperson for the municipal office, Matouš Králík, both stated they could not comment on the case due to confidentiality obligations. Vaněk also refused to say whether there would be any retrospective review of whether his former colleagues mishandled the case. "I can't comment on that," he said. Initially, the Central Bohemian Regional Office did not want to deal with the case. Spokesperson David Šíma wrote that the regional OSPOD knew nothing about the matter because it had not received any information about it in the past. "This issue is currently being handled by criminal justice authorities, and the regional office is not authorized to intervene or participate in the proceedings at this time," the spokesperson wrote. However, he was referring to the criminal proceedings against the mother and her partner, which do not address the conduct of the authorities.

Only after the reporter followed up and requested a statement from Governor Petra Pecková (STAN) did things begin to move slightly. "I feel immense sorrow for the boys, and the mother deserves punishment for failing to protect them and instead abusing them. I regret that the responsible OSPOD staff did not intervene sooner," Governor Pecková stated.

Her colleague, councilor Martin Hrabánek from ODS, who is responsible for the social affairs portfolio, promised to investigate everything. "The newly discovered facts are truly disturbing to me. We will definitely look into where the failure occurred and why child protection did not work over the course of several years," Hrabánek told Seznam Zprávy.

According to the governor, if misconduct is confirmed, "accountability must be enforced." However, state prosecutor Miloslava Zagarová does not intend to file a motion with the police to investigate the conduct of the social workers—even though she herself wrote in the indictment that the mother and her partner abused the boys at least since March 2019, and that the father had been reporting bruises to OSPOD since 2017. "That was already investigated, and it wasn't proven at the time, so there was no evidence for it," Zagarová told Seznam Zprávy.

The boys are now 10 and 8 years old. They live with their father, his current wife, and two siblings. At home, they don't talk about what happened when they lived with their mother. "According to the psychologist, they are about two to three years behind. They lost part of their childhood," says the father. According to expert reports, they will carry the consequences for the rest of their lives.

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family relationship, the cooperation between the court, experts and social workers aims to ensure the child's relationship with both parents (equality), or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed — specifically due to violence)

https://www.seznamzpravy.cz/clanek/domaci-kauzy-urady-mohly-detem-usetrit-roky-utrpeni-neverily-vsak-ze-je-matka-tyra-239525

 October 2025 – The Public For The Father

Two days after the court hearing, the father received a letter from the Deputy Chair of the Regional Court, which I have seen. In the letter, it states: "The necessary data could not be retrieved even from some of the viewed files on the flash drive you submitted."

How is it possible that the Deputy Chair of the Regional Court was able to view the files, while the presiding judge of the same court panel was not—and even refused to allow the files to be played during the hearing, as the father requested?

To the public, this gives the impression that the court is rejecting evidence that is crucial to assessing the case and relates directly to violence committed against the child.

Regarding the recordings, the Deputy Chair further stated:
"In your complaint, despite its length and reference to its attachments, no relevant information is provided from which it would be possible to determine what proceedings the complaint concerns, under what case number the matter is filed, and at which court."
Yet the father was explicitly asked at the filing office to specify to whom the evidence should be submitted, and he clearly stated that the documents were intended for the court president and the judge, whose full name he specified, in connection with his appeal.

The hearing was also attended by a court-appointed expert who had previously authored a report unfavorable to the father. I quote (verbatim from the recording):

Expert: "If we are talking about the possibility of hearing the documents you read today, then that plays a role in my decision-making."
Judge: "When you heard the additional context from the documents, does that influence your recommendations on how to set up parental care going forward?"
Expert: "We see here a lack of respect for authority, we see it also in the context of disruption at the educational institution. From my perspective, it's a disruption of the psychosomatic development of other children. We see that behavioral correction is absent."
Judge: "So if I ask about the measure taken by the first-instance court, which banned personal contact, what impact does the father's attitude have on the minor? Is supervised contact even an option?"
Expert: "In the context of non-respect for anything, it can be expected that supervised contact will not be accepted."

The father then asked the expert:
Father: "Did you know that the incident at the kindergarten happened before classes started, and the children were in a completely different room, and all that happened was that I greeted my son, he hugged me around the neck and didn't want to let go?"
Expert: "I only heard what was read from the documents."
Father: "So you don't know more about it. Okay."

Father: "Do you know that during the psychological evaluation, we talked for an hour, and the doctor said I was mentally completely fine?"
Expert: "I don't remember that."
Father: "It's on the recording."

Father: "On the phone you said the evaluation must last two hours. I accept your apology, but do you think a 14-minute evaluation is sufficient?"
Expert: "It was an observation of the interaction between you and the minor, and that was sufficient."

Expert on relationship suitability: "One part is your relationship with your son, and the other is how you behave toward the mother."
Father: "So when you heard that recordings exist, how would you assess that?"
Expert: "That's for the court to assess."

Father: "Is it even possible that I negatively influenced my son when I saw him only six times over six months?"
The judge rejected the question at that moment, even though the father said he didn't understand the expert's initial answer.

The questioning of the expert in court was then terminated by the judge. The expert does not stay with tears in her eyes until the end of the hearing, she wipes her tears and leaves the courtroom. The expert's testimony gave the public the impression that it was aimed at justifying a ban on contact. When the father asked questions about his submitted evidence, she responded that she was unaware of it. Thus, the evidence presented by the father—demonstrating violence against the child—was not taken into account during the proceedings.

The expert assessed harm, and therefore the reason for banning contact, based on the father's lack of respect for the mother. However, the child must be protected, and the court currently views the father's defense of the child as disrespect toward the other parent and refuses to accept the evidence. Instead, it seeks to prevent any contact between the child and the father.

After the father's closing statement, which was deeply personal, the judge announced a recess. Afterwards, the judge stated:
"It is appropriate for the parents to contact the counseling center. Each of you will arrange an individual appointment and attend it. The center has already been contacted by the court and is aware of this."

During the break, the judge called the counseling center and promptly scheduled appointments. The center's consultant told the father by phone that this was not a psychological evaluation, but a setup for supervised contact, and that he should bring the court ruling. The father replied that no ruling had been issued yet. The consultant responded that this was strange, as she had received instructions based on a ruling. The father explained that the ruling was expected on November 12, and the consultant said she didn't understand.

The public believes that the decision to postpone was influenced by the final minutes of the hearing—specifically the father's heartfelt closing statement and the atmosphere in the courtroom. The proceedings have been adjourned until mid November, and the public suspects that the purpose of the adjournment is to establish supervised contact for the father.

The father is fighting intensely to have his son in his care—and the public stands with him.

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (violence does not exist, we do not look at the past); no examination of the history of the family relationship, the cooperation between the court, experts and social workers aims to ensure the child's relationship with both parents (equality), or only with the one who does not obstruct the other's caregiving (the parent obstructed — specifically due to violence); (So we only accommodate those who respect the other parent.) In this case, the parent did not show respect—he reported the other parent to the Police and OSPOD due to physical violence committed against the child, and any correction of the father's behavior toward the mother currently appears, of course, unlikely... These phrases are already well known to the public... from many other rulings, just like the statements that the parent does not respect authorities, the other parent, etc.

The father welcomes any help. 

Placement of the child in alternating/shared custody against the child's wishes

If you explore this issue in more detail, you will find a large number of statements from parents regarding alternating or shared custody imposed against the child's will.

From the interviews I conducted as part of my research, I highlight especially the difference between care with love and care without love, which in practice manifests as follows:

• The child does not attend extracurricular activities during the week spent with the other parent, because that parent refuses to accompany the child to them.
• The child is effectively entrusted to another person's care (nanny, grandparent), because the other parent does not adapt their life to the needs of the child.
• The child does not feel love and understanding from the other parent, only directive commands.
• The child fears the other parent due to their behavior or past experiences in the shared household.
• The child explicitly wishes to be with the first parent, who has adapted their life to having a child and wants to care for them with love.

Now let us turn to the statements of parents who feel their child has been harmed—specifically, in their right to a childhood filled with love, happiness, and understanding. These parents evaluate not only shared or alternating custody, but also sole custody. Due to the need for translation, the statements are summarized in a single document.

Parents from various regions of the Czech Republic expressed their views under the petition titled "For the Protection of the Rights and Mental Health of Czech Children."

https://www.petice.com/za_ochranu_prav_a_psychickeho_zdravi_eskych_dti?fbclid=IwY2xjawL78JpleHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHpaKls6P-X0-PB5lKs5_p7pCvF0RxwUKYwPvw44d8s64nfl3__kMh4mjafzP_aem_G7Gy-NSNcR3y9lKyxGBwLg

A verbatim transcript and translation is available in the attachment. 

(+15) committed suicide

... every time I try it, I just see black and it doesn't work...

This boy is one of those whom I pointed out that we should take a closer look into the past to see if we can find signs of violence in the family. By chance, I can look into the boy's past personally.

This time I will make an exception, I will not start from the consequence, but far in the past. And I do this so that you can put yourself at least a little in the shoes of this boy, so that you can live with him those moments that he has experienced in his short life, and that will hopefully finally open the eyes of all of us in our society:

...victims to leave immediately in the event of psychological or physical violence and not to return, and there is already a lot of awareness in this area (e.g. the Lend a Hand project), because this will save themselves, and if the perception of violence in society changes, then the child will also be saved...

...teachers to pay attention to children who show signs of behaviour that could lead to violence;

… and especially state institutions (OSPOD, court) to listen to the child's wishes and comply with the wishes, regardless of how violence is viewed in our society (presumption of innocence, raising the presumption of false accusations of violence) and how violence is actually judged in our country (minimum sentences).

Only in this way will we effectively protect the victims (parent and child), enable children to develop healthily, be safe, happy, understand and thus prevent depression, anxiety and suicide of children.

I tell the boy's life story through his eyes, based on the evidence I have at my disposal – the verdict, the protocols with the boy's testimony at OSPOD, the protocols with the mother's testimony at OSPOD, the boy's text messages with his father, the text message with his mother, the text message with his friend, the boy's videos, his mother's testimony and the last video of the boy, his last message before he left forever... Everything is based on evidence, no fiction.

However, do not get the impression that the boy has said everything, because as you already know, for example, from Viktor's story (the first story in the "Consequences" section), some experiences are difficult to talk about even in front of close people, or children often do not talk about them at all. What is behind closed doors often stays behind closed doors, out of fear, out of fear that no one will believe it and that it will be even worse...

I was born in 2008 and lived with my mom and dad... in violence. Dad beat my mom at home and he wasn't even ashamed of it. He openly told his mother's parents that it was his own fault. I witnessed domestic violence. About five years later, in January 2013, I moved with my mother to a shelter, because my father physically attacked my mother again, and he was also aggressive towards me. My mother dealt with it through the Police of the Czech Republic, filed a criminal complaint against my father and applied for sole custody, which was granted.

This was followed by an apology from my dad and after about a month my mother gave my dad another chance, withdrew the criminal complaint and we returned to him. My mother continued to have sole custody of me, but we lived with my father.

In June 2015, my mother went to OSPOD, I was 7 years old. My mother informs them that I have had problems since kindergarten, conflicts, conjectures, aggressive behavior. The educational committee shows that I was present in conflict situations between parents (a conflict situation is called formally, but in fact it is violence, in our case it was psychological violence and physical beatings). Elementary school points out the problems they have with me, I behave wildly, I beat my classmates, I say I touch other children. Mom tells OSPOD workers that I really got a note because I hit a classmate in the crotch. I told my mother that the teacher then pushed me against the wall and told me not to say anything at home. Regarding the touching, the mother said that she did not know anything, that she was learning about it for the first time from OSPOD workers. They ask my mother if I go to the pedagogical and psychological counselling centre ("PPP"). My mother replied that she was there with me, and PPP said that I didn't have a problem, that I didn't have to go there, that she saw the problem between my parents. Furthermore, my mother tells them that based on the teacher's recommendation, since April 2015 I have been going with my mother every 14 days to TRIANGL (professional counseling for children and their families in an unfavorable psychosocial situation, with a primary focus on the child's needs). OSPOD workers gave my mother the contact details of the Educational Care Centre. My mother tells the OSPOD workers that my dad treats me nicely if he's in the mood. He is very impulsive, speaks inappropriately, sometimes he is rude.My mother also tells OSPOD that she went to a shelter with me in the past and that she filed a criminal complaint against my father, which she subsequently withdrew because her father persuaded her and that we all live together. My mother also informs OSPOD that since her return, he has physically attacked her several times, is rude to her and slanders verbally even in front of me. OSPOD tells the workers that I am shouting at my dad at home to leave my mother alone. My mother confides in the OSPOD workers that she is thinking about leaving my dad, and she would like to do it when I am away for a longer time, during the summer holidays, so that I am not there. My mother also informs OSPOD that she wants to change my primary school. She was recommended to move to another primary school. My mother got contacts to Acorus and the Intervention Center.

After that, my dad and I lived for about a year and a half. Then we moved out of my dad's house, it was about 2017, I was 9 years old. I lived with my mom and saw my dad once every 14 days for the weekend, I was at my mom's and dad's house alternately. I don't like to go to my dad's, I often ask my mom not to have to go there. I told my mother several times that she was burning me with nettles on purpose at the cottage. It bothered her. I didn't tell my mom more.

Mother's note: "I told him several times to be nice to my son, especially not to put his hand on him, that otherwise I would deal with it, not to insult him, and it usually ended in a quarrel, vulgar swearing and putting down the phone."

I start thinking about suicide, I don't feel good about what's happening, what's happening to me. I don't want to go to my dad's. I found out that I have a split personality – when I'm not well, when I'm angry, I behave like him, I'm the same, I'm rude, I beat my classmates, they complain about me to my mom at school, she has problems because of me, I don't like that strict teacher... Dad is also strict. I don't feel like thinking about what will happen tomorrow, I don't plan anything, I don't even imagine my future... I don't like myself.

I talk to my mom, I tell her sometimes that she would have less to worry about if I wasn't here. Mom always says that it's not true, that she loves me and that she's happy to have me and that I'm here, that if I wasn't there, that she wouldn't be able to do it without me, that I would hurt her the most, that she loves me very much. I like her very much, too.

The turning point came in April 2022, I was 14 years old. There was me, my dad, an educational counsellor from the primary school and my class teacher. The class teacher informs my mom and dad that she thinks I was well received in the team, but the problem is attendance. There had to be a reclassification, but I managed it excellently, according to her point of view, in the end I got a two. As for other subjects, there are reserves, there will be some additional classifications. She says that I have many unexcused missed classes and that I have antipathy towards the gym teacher, who is consistent.

I refused to comment on this. They asked me what my relationship was with my mother's boyfriend. I replied that it was normal. They asked me about Friday's conflict. I replied that my mom had promised me money, I went out for pizza with my friends. My mom didn't give me the money right away, so I told her to "fuck" give it to me. My mom refused to give it to me and I shoved it into her. I didn't want to hurt her. I apologized to her for this behavior. Then they told me to go outside.

Negotiations without the son occur: The parents are led by OSPOD to an agreement regarding the minor (a detailed description of the management of the agreement is not contained in the protocol, but the mother remembers that she was emphasized that she could not take care of her son). In conclusion, OSPOD agreed that the father would file a motion to entrust the child to his care. The father says that he will file a petition with the court. He has already identified the school that the minor would attend, he will have him under his control and is able to deal with his absence from school operatively. After this sentence, the protocol states that the mother agrees with the proposal. It can only be a matter of consent to a change of school, not to the entire proposal. The mother tells me that she never agreed to entrust the child to the care of the father, because the son did not like to go to him and at the same time did not like to go to him in previous years, and he saw him only once every 14 days on weekends and holidays. Furthermore, the protocol states that the parents agreed that the transfer of the minor can take place after Easter, when the father will arrange for a change of permanent residence and entry into a catchment school. Both representatives of the school agreed with this. The protocol also states that due to the fact that the child is threatening suicide, which is confirmed by the school, parents are advised to seek acute psychiatric help.

They invited me in and I was told the conclusion in front of everyone. I tell them that I don't agree with it in any way, I don't want to be with my father. They asked me why. I didn't answer.

On June 20, 2022, I was at OSPOD, where I wrote a protocol with an OSPOD employee as a fourteen-year-old. I tell her, and she logs it, that it's useless with school, when I have so many A's and I'm going to repeat, now the report card will be handed out and I wouldn't be able to catch up anyway. I tell her that: I don't care about the future, I haven't even thought about it, what would I do. I just play and sleep all day. He asks me about my father – I say that I wouldn't give up with him, that we're the same and I'm afraid that if he gets angry, he might do something to me. Now he is trying to quit smoking and is nervous. I won't teach with him. I have always been afraid to study with him. I say that I was on a stay at the SVP – I took tobacco there, smoked and in the end I had a fight with one boy and then they fired me. Then we went to a psychologist, mostly I talked, I think it was of no use. At home, it looks like mom has a boyfriend, but he's in the apartment for one week and he's with his son the next. I prefer to be at home. When I'm alone with my mom, I feel best. We went to psychiatry about 4 years ago. I eat occasionally, I go to sleep as I want, I don't have a set regimen. When I'm at my dad's house, I don't eat much, he wants me to finish it and then my stomach hurts. Half a pizza is enough for me in one day. I would like to be able to go to my father only when I want to. He doesn't beat me anymore. He beat me when I was younger. My father is aggressive and I know who he is.

Note: there are also these sentences in the protocol: "I want my mom to find a normal boyfriend. It suited me when my mom was with my dad." Since the protocols sometimes contain only excerpts from factual communication, the boy could have said this in connection with his mother's friend in relation to the fact that he was there for a week and not for a week. The mother, on the other hand, recalls how her son talked about how he would like her boyfriend to be his dad. To the sentence "it suited me when my mom was with my dad", it should be added that the boy has been constantly telling his parents since his parents' separation that he did not want to go to his father. Therefore, let's try to compare this statement with another case – Viktor's mother (the first case in "Consequences)" reproached herself for leaving the abusive man and the children had to remain there in sole custody following the verdict. The father then exerted psychological violence on the sensitive child, instead of the mother in the past. Viktor wanted to commit suicide.

My mother supports me, she wants me to stay with her. I don't want to be with him. I said it, my mother said it too. We talked to OSPOD, we wanted to agree with my father that it would remain as before, that I was in the care of my mother, and he 1 time in 14 days for the weekend, but it didn't go through, OSPOD worker threatens that I will either alternate care or I will go to an institution.

Since September, I have been repeating the eighth grade.

On October 3, 2022, my mother and I go to court. I sit next to my mother all the time.

Dad demands a change in upbringing. He says in court that he filed the motion because of my deteriorating behavior, especially my absences from school. She claims that my mother's circumstances have changed recently, that her new boyfriend is paying more attention to me and that he would prefer alternating custody. At the same time, however, he says that he only found out about my problems from school and that he had a communication problem with my mother for a long time, so I don't understand how he can actually know about what is happening in our house and comment on how someone at home treats me, specifically my mother's boyfriend. Dad says there that when I'm at his place for the weekend, he doesn't have a problem with me. He said that I don't take my studies to him, we have breakfast in the morning, walk the dog and then go out to see my girlfriend. Dad says that he was looking to see if they would accept me to a different elementary school in his area, in a different part of the city, than I do now.

My mother says that I had problems getting up in the morning because I stayed up late, played games, and then refused to go to school in the morning. My mother excused me for family reasons, she saw that I was not well. She said that I spend the afternoon with friends or on the computer. Recently, however, according to my mother, I have improved in behavior, I am less consistent, I clean my room.

My mother does not agree with the proposal regarding custody, she says that she wants me to stay in her care. OSPOD worker does not agree with the sole custody of the mother and proposes alternating custody, because she believes that she could benefit me at the moment and that if the mother does not agree to alternating custody, I will go to an institution. "Either or or". Both options are terrible for me. My mother didn't want me to go to an institution. She therefore agreed to alternate custody in court.

The judge then summarizes that the parents are able to agree that I would be with my father at the time when he would have the morning shift and my mother would be with me during the long week.

Then I went for interrogation. I say that I didn't like the team in the original class, they made fun of me for the sake of my grades. It's better in the new class. I say that I have a best friend, that we go out together, sometimes I'm with him, that I don't have hobbies, I just go out with my friends. I say I don't want to be with my father. They ask why, in front of my father. I say I don't know.

They don't care at all what I say or what my mother says. OSPOD begins to summarize what happened in the past, that I have been in the OSPOD records since November 2019, when I received a notification from the school about suspicion of hidden truancy, in February 2020 that I sprayed public buildings and cars, when on the basis of this they included me in a therapeutic psychological or other appropriate educational program in the SVP. I was hired there from November 1, 2021 and on November 22, 2021, I was expelled for violating the conditions. In connection with the conflict with my mother, a case conference took place on 11.4.2022, at which it was agreed that the father would file a petition with the court to change his upbringing, because I respected him more than my mother. They repeat in court again that during the interview I said that I wanted to stay with my mother, that I did not want to go to my father. The OSPOD worker says that I said that I was bored there as the reason. But I told the OSPOD worker something completely different in the protocol as a reason why I didn't want to be with him. The word "boredom" was definitely not there. However, I do not have the opportunity to comment.

The court further summarizes that its decision was based mainly on the fact that I have significant educational problems with my mother in the last two years, truancy was addressed, the local court imposed a measure on me to be included in the educational program for spraying, I was rude to my mother and did not respect her, and I had poor results at school. Since September, I've been repeating my year of elementary school, my team has changed, with which I get along better, I've stopped smoking and spraying, and she also claims that my mother's new partner is also taking care of me. Although there are noticeable advances in my behavior, it is obvious that I need increased supervision and control. By regularly alternating with each of the parents, this supervision will also be ensured by the father and any problems will be detected in time, and given my age, it is appropriate that they be addressed in a timely and fundamental way. Furthermore, the court says that until now my mother had taken care of me, and I had deteriorated greatly in my grades, my mother let me watch TV at night, and instead of going to school in the morning, I was tired and refused to go to school (while my mother testified to OSPOD that I normally went to school, I just didn't get there, which she didn't know). The judge also said that it is up to parents to set firm boundaries on what I can do in my free time to provide me with tutoring and provide me with the same educational environment. In particular, to change the mother's current approach, to place greater emphasis on fulfilling obligations in connection with compliance with compulsory school attendance and ensuring the preparation related to it.

After the judge handed down the verdict, I was angry that my mother didn't defend me enough. I told her and ran home alone, without her.

It is October 2022 and the shared custody regime begins. A week at mom's, a week at dad's. I have school in front of my mother's house. I often go to my mom after school when I have a week with my dad. I go to my father in the evening and tell him that I was out with my friends. We don't tell him that I'm at my mom's. I ask my mother almost all the time if I could stay at home. They said I couldn't. I have to go there. I still have dark thoughts, I'm not feeling well. I like my mom, girlfriend and friends, that keeps me alive.

On April 29, 2023, one boy challenged another boy to fight me - texting him "Do you have a problem with Dan?". He answered no. The boy invited him anyway to meet the next day at the school at six. I lost, I had to kneel next to him at the end, then suddenly the third one hit me hard in the face. It happened on April 30, 2023.

I often complain to my mother that I want to be with her, that I don't want to be with my dad. It can't be done, I have to go there.

I finished elementary school in June 2023.

It's September 2023, I'm starting my apprenticeship. A week of school (at my mom's), a week of practice (that's when I'm at my dad's). I like going to school, that's when I'm with my mom, but I don't like practice. I tell my mother that the master is strict. A classmate even saw me crying there. I'm not good at it, it's hard, I have a carpenter's degree.

I like to make videos and often... On October 14, 2023, I am uploading a video for my girlfriend on TikTok – "I love her so much, it's crazy how much".

I also write to my friend: "When he leaves me, I'll end it, I'm sorry. I just want you to know. As long as I'm with her, I'll probably live, but when she's gone, I'll leave too. Just so you know, I stood by the window for fifty minutes and thought a lot. I don't enjoy life, the only thing I enjoy about it is her. I don't know how long he'll be with me, but as long as he's with me, I'll be,"

It's Sunday, October 22nd, I'm finishing the week with my mom and the autumn holidays are approaching. Tomorrow I have to go to practice and to my dad for a week. I have 3 days of practice ahead of me and then autumn holidays until Sunday, all at my dad's. On Monday, my mother excused me from practice that I was not well. They told my mother to leave me at home for the next few days, that then it would be holidays from Thursday anyway. But my mother couldn't excuse them. She told my dad that I didn't feel good to excuse me for the next few days and he told her that no way, that I would just go to the internship.

I'm uploading another video, this time on a different TikTok account – I have more. I put my photo on the video and add a message to it:

"You really hurt my life",

"Overthinker, split personality, mood swings, ugly eyes, ugly nose, ugly face, ugly figure, ugly hair, domestic violence in the past, feeling like no one cares about me".

"Why did you do that?"

On Wednesday I came to my mother's house. I told her that I hadn't been to practice on Tuesday or Wednesday, that I had been outside instead, but I begged her not to tell Dad. She didn't tell him.

It's Wednesday evening, the autumn holidays are starting, I'm supposed to go to my dad's, but I don't want to. I'm sleeping at a friend's house. My mother writes to me at half past nine in the evening asking me to call her. Then at nine in the evening I write to her that I have eaten. At half past ten in the evening I forward her the messages that my dad sent me. Before six o'clock he wrote to me: "You can't answer the phone??? What time will you come?? You're kidding yourself...". I wrote to him at six in the evening that I was sleeping at a friend's house. He called me at a quarter to nine in the evening, but my phone was turned off. At nine in the evening I turned it on and there are more messages from my dad: "Then forget about it!!" and then another "yes, you actually have holidays... so kindly write the address so I know where you are... and fucking take my phone!!" … and then I received another text message from my dad: "You fucking motherfucker... you haven't been to work... so you're very bad."

I forwarded it to my mom with a message: "I wrote to him and if he writes, I will write back right away. I love you mom <3 and thank you for everything you do for me. I don't want it to end up like last time, so I'll just communicate." (Last time I also told my mom that I was afraid of him, my mom called him... And he promised her then that he would be nice to me. He told her then that it was only necessary to walk the dog...) My mother wrote back that she was worried about me, no matter how much I wrote and called, and that I should apologize to him, that he was rude, pathetic and that I should be nicer. I wrote back to my mother "yes, and don't worry, I won't do anything like that with you during the week and I'll go to school". My mother then wrote to me that she loved me very much and I wrote back to her that I ate more.

It's Thursday morning, autumn holidays. My mother writes to me at a quarter to nine in the morning: "Baby, are you okay?". I write "yes mom. Everything is fine here, I ate here at a friend's house, took a bath and slept well." My mom writes me back, "Well, that's good, and when are you going to go to your dad? That will be a mess, oh yes , I'm afraid for you L" . I just wrote "ok" to my mom, I didn't want to discuss it anymore....(my mom was afraid that he would hurt me physically, after all, he used to beat her and I once confided in her that my dad humiliated me... she was unhappy about it).

I'm at a friend's house during the day and then with my girlfriend until the early evening. I don't want to go to my dad.

A friend writes me a message not to kill myself, that he won't have his best friend in the world here, that it's too early for that. I write "good" to him. Thank you...

It's seven in the evening, I don't want to go to my dad's, I won't go there. I write to my mother "couldn't he please another 90 CZK? I'll buy water and something to eat and sleep outside. Well, probably not, it doesn't matter, I understand, you've already given me too much...". Mom is afraid, Dad's reaction – after all, he once beat her, she knows what he's like... And also what could happen after that, after all, she was threatened in court – either by a substitute or by an institution. He pushes me to go to my dad. He writes to me "go to your dad, otherwise it will be an even bigger mess than before. Go to your dad normally, he's not there, you need to walk the dog (the name of the dog is replaced by "dog"), dad is fine, so please don't be silly. I swear he's fine, Dad."

To mothers, the sentence "I swear..." I write back that "I don't give a fuck, really..." My mother goes on and on, she writes to me that I'm unnecessarily rude, that I don't have to worry about anything, that they love me. I write back to her that "I don't care about myself, I'm going to sleep outside, I'm already on vacation, so I don't give a damn about everything." After a while, I write to her "I love you". My mother replies "but it's cold there". I don't react to that anymore... he writes again after a few minutes "we all do stupid things many times, so please don't be so stubborn and go home"... I don't want to write her back on that. After a while I find out that even my grandmother is calling me... I wrote to my mom to stop writing to my grandmother, that it was really embarrassing...

I feel a lot of pressure. I'm recording a video for my friend: "it doesn't work, it doesn't work anyway mate, every time I try it, I just see black and it doesn't work".

Subsequently, the boy decided to give up his life at the age of fifteen. He didn't read any more messages, from his mother... In the evening: "Come home at any time, whether it is night or morning, please" and the next morning "Come home, please".

Mom writes messages to heaven: "Forgive me that I wasn't your perfect mom, and I couldn't protect you from this evil and cruel time, my little boy loves you very much, forever your mother."

What practice has manifested itself here: Forget about diagnoses (violence does not exist in the family, we do not look at the past); cooperation of the institution (OSPOD, court) in order to ensure the relationship of the child with both parents (shared custody) under the threat of an institution. It should be emphasized that the father ultimately expressed interest in the court only in shared custody, not exclusively, on the basis of his own decision. Otherwise, he would certainly receive exclusive custody, as this would be in accordance with the requirement of OSPOD. The boy's contact with his mother was significantly limited, whom the minor perceived as an emotional support point, he did not want to be with his father, which he did not want in the past once every 14 days, and during the holidays, he refused alternating custody for a week/week. Even at the age of 14, he was not heard by OSPOD or the court, although he also spoke to OSPOD that he was afraid of hurting his father. In the "cause" section, I describe the possible feelings of the child and there is also a question raised from my side: "He is afraid, he does not want to – it is violence for him, and if a loving parent, with whom the child has felt love and security so far, must obligatorily order against his will what he knows is unpleasant for the child. Isn't this secondary violence committed against both the mother and the child? Does the child then find himself in a state where no one understands how he feels, no one cares about him, does not believe in improvement, has no strength, resigns?

for reflection for OSPOD, kindergarten teachers, school teachers and judges: in the case of children who exhibit violent or otherwise inappropriate behaviour (beating their classmates, crying, death threats, spraying, alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, foul language, bullying, or being bullied by other children, etc.), it is highly risky to immediately change the educational environment in order to make some immediate desired correction of the child. This child has very likely been or still is in violence and it is necessary to deal with the cause – what exactly causes the child to behave in this way. Child psychiatrist Petr Pöthe states about the experience of violence: "And then there are so-called behavioral disorders, simply running away from home, self-harm, experimenting with various substances that seem to change the experience, and then of course there are depressive disorders, experience disorders, self-perception disorders, and self-aggression is very common, because you blame yourself somewhere for the fact that it actually happened to you and at the same time you want to deny it, So actually, your personality is not as if complete. "

Mother and son spoke clearly in front of OSPOD. However, they were not heard.

To think about for a psychologist: comment on this statement (based on the testimonies of parents or children who have experience with both children's sensitivity and children's aggression): if a child is sensitive, after a sensitive parent, he develops into a state of low self-esteem and depression, prone to suicidal thoughts. If, on the other hand, the child adopts the behavior of the abusive parent as a standard of behavior, it has a negative effect on his future partner/family relationship.

Why were the mother's claims, the child's claims and the child's wishes not taken into account? Why was the child's wishes not heard and respected? OSPOD was based on the assumption that the best interest of the child is to maintain contact with both parents at all costs, regardless of the violence that the child has witnessed or experiences and describes himself. However, this is one of several errors/shortcomings highlighted by the Grevio group (the group monitoring compliance with the Istanbul Convention) during the inspections carried out in the contracting states. Why has the Czech Republic not ratified the Istanbul Convention, which stipulates in Article 31 that "Cases of violence and domestic violence against women must be taken into account when deciding on custody and visitation rights for minors. Must it be ensured that the exercise of rights related to the care and visitation of the child does not jeopardise the rights and safety of the victim or children'?

Unfortunately, this boy can no longer be helped.

We can help other children... who are in a similar situation and are still alive.

Separation of siblings against their will (one with the mother, the other with the father)

Special Study – Trivialization of a Child's Illness

Single Mothers: The essence of the film lies in the desperate stories of women and children living in poverty, their futile attempts to seek justice through the Czech legal system, authorities, and court-appointed experts, and their determination to fight against injustice.

Recording timestamp 36:10 and onward… "Míra was born in March 2000. Míra's father didn't want me to breastfeed him, he was bothered by the fact that I was at home on maternity leave. Míra's father pays 1,400 CZK. Since Míra was 7, they've been deciding on increasing child support, and now he's 14. After I pay everything, we're left with 4,000 CZK to live on.

The District Court in Ústí nad Labem issued a ruling stating that Míra does not suffer from Asperger's syndrome, and if I insist otherwise, he will have to be removed from my care and placed in an institutional care. The reason is that the expert, Dr. Jana Procházková, stated that I am committing abuse of a minor and neglecting care.

According to doctors at Motol University Hospital, from the child psychiatry department where he was hospitalized for three weeks, he does have Asperger's syndrome. It's terrible—on one hand, I'm accused of abusing and neglecting my child, and on the other hand, I'm literally crawling on the floor, doing everything I can to make my child happy and give him a life. But the result is that my son, who is 14, has been living with one foot in a children's home for three years, and we never know when a social worker might have a bad day and decide that I'm neglecting him, and place him in the institution through a preliminary measure.

Social workers are a strange chapter. I don't really understand it. Most of these women are kind, empathetic, non-confrontational, they speak softly and calmly, they don't use foul language. But their passive aggression is so crushing that it really corners you. And what a social worker says carries more weight than what a parent says. The world feels cruel and unjust to me."

Identified Practice: Forget diagnoses (illness does not exist); no examination of the history of the family relationship (illness), the cooperation between the court, experts and social workers. In practice, pressure is being exerted on the mother to go to work and stop claiming that the child is ill. The amount of child alimonies is absolutely devastating considering the rising costs of raising a child in today's society.

https://www.ceskatelevize.cz/porady/10781202771-samozivy/